The dark of your pupil

sugar in your spoon

you act like a child

inexperienced and blind

scapegoat for everything

the splinter in my eye

your dark side rise

holding me back

I struggle

my future




©AmandavdL 2010


40 Responses to “FRAGMENTS”

  1. Loved it Buttercup =)

  2. powerfully said!

  3. lifeinarecipe Says:

    Captivating. I had to read it several times…so many twists and turns to my imagination. It is a true work of art!

  4. very nicely done… love the pic too! 🙂

  5. I feel the emotion in your words. The photo of the woman with a tear on her face says it all. I am listening to the music now. Very dynamic work of art, Amanda. Thank you for sharing.

    • Thanks Carol….tried to write something different (fiction) away from the neverending love scenes!!! LOL….hope you have a brilliant weekend…I’m going to seek the sun, it’s a beautiful day and will come and look at all the new postings later in the day. Have a great weekend my friend x

  6. WOW! How you’ve described that helplessness, is really quite amazing Amanda!!
    It really had me hooked! I had images flashing in my mind… bbbrrr… and they were not very pretty either! I almost saw you sitting with a painting of this expression.. I dunno why and how, but I just did!!!

    Your choice of image and song are perfect here! 🙂
    For a looooooooooooong time, Don’t Speak was my favorite song… I used to sing (more like croak) it all the time!! Even now, I involuntarily started singing it! 🙂

    Phheeww…amazing piece of fiction! You should try G-Man’s Flash Friday 55! 🙂

    Hope you are having a Serene Saturday Morning! 🙂
    Enjoy a fabulous weekend, girlie! LOVE YA LOADS!

    • I love love love that song so very much too…had to laugh when I read your comment….LOLOLOL…thanks my friend, you being here warms my heart and I value your friendship more than I can ever say!! Dont ever forget that!! Whatever you do, have a FABULOUS weekend my dear friend. Sending you so much love xxxx

  7. OMG!!!!! this is BRILLIANT!!!the image and the song match perfectly with the poem….wonderfully put…Have an amazing saturday:)

  8. Love this song…my daughter used to listen to it all the time. It goes perfectly with the mood of the poem and the photo. The splinter in my eye…. now that is sharp pain; pain to be better of without. Loved the character’s realization h at the end of the poem.:) Heartspell xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

  9. A short story in a short poem. Very good. I like it … A little different turn for you??? 🙂 Nice.

    Happy Saturday …

  10. Very interesting, nice tight framework for a dark tale.

  11. wow, amazing how such small words can portray such powerful emotions if written properly 🙂

  12. Wow, very powerful.. : )

  13. so dark and so full of emotion–very nice.

  14. I love this……darky stuff is for me by far the greatest…..take care over there….

  15. Dark and beautiful. Love it!

  16. Sugar in your spoon? Dark of your pupils? LOVE those images, and this poem.

    And that No Doubt song!!


  17. Amanda, you have done it again…used your unique style to say so very much in a simple, succinct way. I really like this slight departure in theme as well.
    Well done 🙂


  18. I got wrapped up with your words on this lovely poem. It was very intense and full of passion. 🙂

    • Wow….. so many messages from you makes me very happy. Thanks so much Luisa, I am sending one message to cover all…..running so far behind and feels like I’ll never catch up!! Hope your week will be a wonderful and smiling one!!! Hugs and love to you xxxx

  19. oh my 😦

    um…… no words 😛

  20. Helplessness at the sharp edge of a tooth’s blade. Yes, I really did feel that. Very effective, Amanda.

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